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What A Time To Be Alive
Posted November 17, 2008 by Shakti Sombrero
It's a great time to be in the paranoia business because apparently paranoia is on the rise. According to a crack team of British researchers using virtual reality helmets, paranoid thoughts are more common than previously thought.
According to the AP, surveys of several thousands of people in Britain, the United States and elsewhere have found that rates of paranoia are slowly rising.
A British survey found 21 percent of people thought there had been times when others were acting against them, and another survey of 1,000 adults in New York found that 11 percent thought other people were following or spying on them.
These people are right to be worried and we can only assume these numbers have been underreported. Panicwatch.org itself currently employs no less than half a dozen full-time spies in the subways of New York whose only job is to tail people who know the real truth about any number of things like AIDS, water-to-gasoline coverups, and reptoids. We have endless file cabinets (can't trust computers!) in dusty rooms of our bunker complex full of manila folders, tracking all of this stuff. Seriously there's a whole wing dedicated to reptoids. We reveal this only as a warning to our "marks". We know you talked to the media. We know what you're trying to do. Take this revelation a token of our goodwill...something to give you a fighting chance; you're gonna need it.
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Top Threats!
Jan 25 - Mar 8, 2008
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